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Writer's pictureMioi Forster-Nakayama

Newsletter No.27 Moving Forward with Grief


Hello, everyone. I hope you all have been doing well. It has been warm and cold at the same time while flowers have been blooming here and there in Adelaide. I am going to write about my grief in this newsletter. If you may be and feel sensitive about this topic, I encourage you to read it when you are ready. I know grief is an excruciating experience.


Grief

Between the 1st and 2nd year of my dance movement therapy training in London, my mother passed away due to cancer. I experienced that my body became so numb and unmoveable while I was in the training. Luckily, I had weekly personal therapy, and space at the college to bodily explore about my grief. And of course, I had my beautiful colleagues who just sat next to me and stayed in my pains. I think I was crying every day in the first year of my grief. And maybe in the 2nd year too. It has been now 8 years since my mother died.


Freud states that dreams are a path to unconscious (Anderson, 2011). Two weeks before she was gone, I had a dream. My mother was injured and I was calling for an ambulance. There was a little boy who came to me and said, “I can take you to your mother.” So I followed him. Soon I realised there were a lot of crosses where we arrived. I still remember this eight-year old dream. This year I remembered the actual date of her passing, but on the actual day, I completely forgot about it. Two days after, my mother appeared in my dream after a long time. There was my son in the dream too. I was telling my mother that he (my son) was coming to see you. But he never turned up. Then my mother said, “I need to go and catch an airplane.” She was gone when my son arrived. Then I woke up! What a symbolic dream I had this year.


I occasionally had a bit of tears in my eyes when suddenly remembering her. Something still can trigger me in that moment. I can now tell you that I have moved forwarded with my grief. Grief will never go away but stays in us with a lesser impact. We know that the pandemic brought too many losses and millions of people have been grieving intensely for the last two years. We cannot ignore mental, bodily impacts on us by the pandemic – whether we lost the loved ones or not. If you know someone is grieving, please let them know that your thoughts are with them. That is really good enough for those who grieve. I came across a good TED talk about grief. It is worth watching if you are ready.


Upcoming Events

Move & Connect 21st July from 7pm to 8pm at the Room 7, Mitcham Community Centre.

Practitioners’ Learning Circle 24th July from 3pm till 4:30pm (AEST).

FREE Dance Movement Therapy Taster Session – 23rd August 2022 at Sophia, Cumberland Park, SA

Body Mapping Workshop Spring – 14th and 15th October 2022


If you are currently grieving, I am with you in your pains. I know what it is like to lose someone you love and care. I hope your pains can get easier year by year as you may move forward with your grief. Thank you for reading my newsletter.


Reference

Anderson, R. (2011). Freud. Bullet Guide. Hodder Education. London.

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